Seasons Change…..

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I’ve learned that things change, people change, and it doesn’t mean you forget the past or try to cover it up. It simply means that you move on and treasure the memories. Letting go doesn’t mean giving up… it means accepting that some things weren’t meant to be.

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My mother in law gave me this Pretty shirt I’m wearing. I Love it! It goes perfectly with my bangle my daughter Breana bought me. Loving all the colors.
Song that reminds me of today’s post: Season’s Change by Expose
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Regret and Choices

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Here is another great read by Angel Chernoff. It talks about 10 choices you will regret in 10 years. We all have things happen in our lives that we will regret or have our reservations about. I know I have plenty that I can recall about.

Wearing a mask to impress others. – If the face you always show the world is a mask, someday there will be nothing beneath it.  Because when you spend too much time concentrating on everyone else’s perception of you, or who everyone else wants you to be, you eventually forget who you really are.  So don’t fear the judgments of others; you know in your heart who you are and what’s true to you.  You don’t have to be perfect to impress and inspire people.  Let them be impressed and inspired by how you deal with your imperfections.

Letting someone else create your dreams for you. – The greatest challenge in life is discovering who you are; the second greatest is being happy with what you find.  A big part of this is your decision to stay true to your own goals and dreams.  Do you have people who disagree with you?  Good.  It means you’re standing your ground and walking your own path.  Sometimes you’ll do things considered crazy by others, but when you catch yourself excitedly losing track of time, that’s when you’ll know you’re doing the right thing.  Read The 4-Hour Workweek.

Keeping negative company. – Don’t let someone who has a bad attitude give it to you.  Don’t let them get to you.  They can’t pull the trigger if you don’t hand them the gun.  When you remember that keeping the company of negative people is a choice, instead of an obligation, you free yourself to keep the company of compassion instead of anger, generosity instead of greed, and patience instead of anxiety.

Being selfish and egotistical. – A life filled with loving deeds and good character is the best tombstone.  Those who you inspired and shared your love with will remember how you made them feel long after your time has expired.  So carve your name on hearts, not stone.  What you have done for yourself alone dies with you; what you have done for others and the world remains.

Avoiding change and growth. – If you want to know your past look into your present conditions.  If you want to know your future look into your present actions.  You must let go of the old to make way for the new; the old way is gone, never to come back.  If you acknowledge this right now and take steps to address it, you will position yourself for lasting success.  The Power of Habit.

Giving up when the going gets tough. – There are no failures, just results.  Even if things don’t unfold the way you had expected, don’t be disheartened or give up.  Learn what you can and move on.  The one who continues to advance one step at a time will win in the end.  Because the battle is always won far away and long before the final victory.  It’s a process that occurs with small steps, decisions, and actions that gradually build upon each other and eventually lead to that glorious moment of triumph.

Trying to micromanage every little thing. – Life should be touched, not strangled.    Sometimes you’ve got to relax and let life happen without incessant worry and micromanagement.  Learn to let go a little before you squeeze too tight.  Take a deep breath.  When the dust settles and you can once again see the forest for the trees, take the next step forward.  You don’t have to know exactly where you’re going to be headed somewhere great.  Everything in life is in perfect order whether you understand it yet or not.  It just takes some time to connect all the dots.

Settling for less than you deserve. – Be strong enough to let go and wise enough to wait for what you deserve.  Sometimes you have to get knocked down lower than you have ever been to stand up taller than you ever were before.  Sometimes your eyes need to be washed by your tears so you can see the possibilities in front of you with a clearer vision again.  Don’t settle.

Endlessly waiting until tomorrow. – The trouble is, you always think you have more time than you do.  But one day you will wake up and there won’t be any more time to work on the things you’ve always wanted to do.  And at that point you either will have achieved the goals you set for yourself, or you will have a list of excuses for why you haven’t.  Read The Last Lecture.

Being lazy and wishy-washy. – The world doesn’t owe you anything, you owe the world something.  So stop daydreaming and start DOING.  Develop a backbone, not a wishbone.  Take full responsibility for your life – take control.  You are important and you are needed.  It’s too late to sit around and wait for somebody to do something someday.  Someday is now; the somebody the world needs is YOU.

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There goes my comfy dress by Cabi. From my sis http://fashiondujourdaily.WordPress.com
Check her blog out!
My baby girl and I!

My Aunt Fey Inspires Me….Congratulations on your Masters Degree!!!!

Thank you to all the people in my life who inspire me…You make me see the possibilities in life that I may not have seen on my own!

This past Saturday, my kids and I drove to Cal State San Bernardino to watch our aunt receive her Masters Degree in Education. My aunt works as a math teacher at different schools. I was so excited and happy to share this with my kids and family. This was a message to them to go further in your educational goals. My Aunt Fey has 3 kids and began going to college while my cousins were very young. She is my inspiration and I plan to meet up there with my educational goals as well. She has taught me that as long as you put your heart and determination into your goals, God will make a way out of No Way! Thank You Aunt Fey for our conversations and always reaching out to me over the years. Love You So Much….See you at my graduation soon 🙂

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Congratulations Aunt Fey!!!!Yayyyy

Learn How To Love People….Not Things

What most people need to learn in life is how to love people and use things instead of using people and loving things.

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When we think about it with a pure effort we realize that the only things that truly matter in life are the things that we do to bless others, and that the only thing that will truly matter when we leave this earth are our relationships with the people around us we develop, and our relationship with God. When we use people we pretty much wreck our relationships with those people. Relationships are supposed to be built on solid ground, and using people for certain things doesn’t allow for a solid foundation to a relationship at all.

When we develop a love for things in our lives instead of for life itself we truly miss the point of life. Remember that material things may be able to satisfy your appetite for a short while, but love will satisfy appetites for lifetimes. Learn how to love people for who they are and use things around you as water to a plant, only to create growth and beauty, not to create and maintain life.

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I received this dress as a gift from my sis in law some years ago. I couldn’t fit it when she first gave it to me, but I love it! It’s very comfortable and is my style. Thanks http://fashiondujourdaily.WordPress.com
The dress is by Cabi
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Inspired Self…..and Life

I was doing my usual reading about being inspired, and came across these points by Marc Chernoff. These are things that all of us face in life. Everyone that’s inspired should know….

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Life’s biggest limitations are the ones you make in your mind.  Life’s biggest causes of unhappiness are the false beliefs you refuse to let go of.  You are capable of far more than you are presently thinking, imagining, doing or being.  But you will ultimately become what you habitually contemplate; so clear your mind and let your hopes, not your hurts, shape your future.

You must deal with the world the way it is, not the way you wish it was.  Think positive.  Life is good.  Too many people miss the silver lining because they’re expecting pure gold.  Positive thinking isn’t about expecting the best to always happen, but accepting that whatever happens is the best for the moment.  So keep smiling and keep following your heart.  Someday, life will get tired of upsetting you.  Read Happiness Is a Serious Problem.

What others do is out of your control.  Realize that you can’t always count on others to respect your feelings, even if you respect theirs.  Being a good person doesn’t guarantee that others will be good people too.  You only have control over yourself – over how you choose to be as an individual.  And as for others, you can only accept them, or walk away.

You were not meant to sit at the edge of your comfort zone.  Not trying for fear of falling.  Not loving for fear of losing love.  Not speaking your truth for fear of what others will think.  Not looking at yourself in the mirror for fear of what you might see.  Try, and then try again with all your might.  Your courage will unfold as your resolve takes hold.  And with each effort you make you will earn a little more confidence which you can use to acquire what no one else can give you: Your self-respect, and the life you were meant to live.

You are not like anyone else.  Don’t you ever let anyone tell you that you can’t be exactly who you are.  In a world of comparison and conformity, take a stand.  Make your own statement.  Honor your own truth.  Risk speaking your own thoughts and sharing your own ideas.  Express your fears, tears, doubts, and insecurities – let others experience the real you.  Have the courage to be yourself and realize that you’re perfect just the way you are.  Read The Art of Non-Conformity.

True love is one-way traffic.  It’s a pure flow of giving and expecting nothing in return.  Anything else is a contract.  Notice how whenever you allow love to flow you are always clear, calm and strong.  It is only when the thought arises, “What have they given me in return?” that there is confusion and resentment.  Ego transacts, love transforms.  Life is too short for all these meticulous contracts and transactions.  Remain clear, remain bright, and remain strong.  Love without expectation.

You cannot live your life at the mercy of chance.  You cannot stumble along with a map marked only with the places you fear, or the places you know you don’t want to revisit.  You cannot remain trapped, endlessly, in a state where you are unable to ask for directions, even though you’re terribly lost, because you don’t know your destination.  You have to stand up, look at yourself in the mirror, and say, “It isn’t good enough for me to know only what I DON’T want in life.  I need to decide what I DO want.”

Being genuine is more important than being right.  You may say or do all the right things, but if it doesn’t come from the heart, it means nothing.  You may not always know the right things to say or do, but if your intent is genuine, then it means the world.  When you work from a foundation of truth, you are free to make as many choices, free to make as many mistakes, free to take as much time as necessary to get it right.  Read As a Man Thinketh.

Your future depends on what you do right now.  Challenge yourself to be who you know you are capable of being.  Challenge yourself to follow through – to live what you preach, to walk your talk.  Don’t worry about how slowly you feel you’re heading toward your goals, or how many roadblocks you find, or how many detours you’re forced to take.  As long as you keep doing your thing, you’re still cruising far ahead of everyone who’s too scared to even try.

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Hope You Enjoyed…God Bless!

Bad Company…

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I read this great article by Marc Chernoff, it was about being in bad company. So I’m sharing some warning signs to know you are in bad company. I know all of us at some point in life was in bad company. I sure know I have….more than once.

1.  They only make time for you when it’s convenient for them. It’s obvious, but any relationship without regular interaction and communication is going to have problems, especially when there’s a lack of commitment. Don’t waste your time with someone who only wants you around when it’s convenient for them.  You shouldn’t have to force someone to make a space in their life for you, because if they truly care about you they will gladly create space for you. Being in a relationship with someone who overlooks your worth isn’t loyalty, it’s stupidity.  Never beg someone for attention.  Know your self-worth, and move on if you must.

  2.  They hold your past against you. Some people will refuse to accept that you are no longer who you used to be – that you’ve made mistakes in the past, learned from them, and moved past them.  They may not be able to stand the fact that you’re growing and moving on with your life, and so they will try to drag your past to catch up with you.  Do not help them by acknowledging their negative behavior.  Keep moving forward. Holding on to the unchangeable past is a waste of energy and serves no purpose in creating a better day today.  If someone continuously judges you by your past and holds it against you, you might have to repair your future by leaving them behind.
BC3.  You feel trapped. Healthy relationships keep the doors and windows wide open.  Plenty of air is flowing and no one feels trapped.  Relationships thrive in this kind of unrestricted environment.  You can come and go as you please, but you choose to stay because where you are is where you want to be. If you want to be a part of someone’s life, all the open doors and windows in the world won’t make you leave.  If someone has closed them all in an effort to trap you into something you don’t want to be a part of, it’s time to find the strength to kick down the door.  (Angel and I discuss this in detail in the Relationships and Self-Love chapters of 1,000 Little Things Happy, Successful People Do Differently.)
4.  They discredit your dreams and abilities. If you allow others to define your dreams and abilities, then you enable them to hold you back.  What you’re capable of achieving is not a function of what other people think is possible for you.  What you’re capable of achieving depends on what you choose to do with your time and energy. People will throw all sorts of assumptions your way about what is possible and what is impossible.  Look beyond the presumptions and mental limitations of others, and connect with your own best vision of how YOUR life can be.  Life is an open-ended journey, and what you achieve comes from what you expect to achieve and what you work to achieve. So don’t worry about what everyone else thinks.  Keep living your truth.  The only people that will get mad at you for doing so are those who want you to live a lie.

5.  They have lied to you more than once. Love is a verb, not a noun.  It is ACTIVE in all relationships.  Love is not just feelings of passion and romance between lovers; it is also a behavior among friends and family.  If someone lies to you, they are unlovingly disrespecting you and your relationship. When you keep someone in your life who is a chronic liar, and you keep giving them new chances to be trusted, you have a lot in common with this person – you’re both lying and being unloving to you! Bottom line:  Those who avoid the truth and tell you only what you want to hear do so for their own benefit, not yours.  Don’t put up with it.  (Read Emotional Vampires.)

6.  Their negativity is rubbing off on you. The negative people in your life don’t just behave negatively towards you, but towards everyone they interact with.  What they say and do is a projection of their own reality – their own inner issues.  Even if they say something to you that seems personal – even if they insult you directly – it likely has zero to do with you. This is important to remember because what these negative people say and do shouldn’t be taken to heart.  Although you don’t have control over what they say and do; you do have control over whether or not you allow them to say and do these things to you.  You alone can deny their venomous words and actions from invading your heart and mind.  If you feel like these people are getting to you, take a break and give yourself some space to breathe. Positive things happen when you distance yourself from negative people.  Doing so doesn’t mean you hate them, it simply means you respect yourself.

7.   They are excessively envious of what you have. A little bit of envy is OK, but when someone is excessively envious of what you have, there’s a good chance what they really want is to take it from you. Excessive envy doesn’t tell you how much someone admires you, it tells you how much they dislike themselves.  If you can, try to help lift them up, but also be careful that they don’t pull you down.  Oftentimes no amount of love, or promises, or proof from you will ever be enough to make them feel better about themselves.  For the broken pieces they carry, are pieces they must mend for themselves.  Happiness, after all, is an inside job.

8.  They motivate you to be judgmental or hateful. Truth be told, no human being is superior.  No faith, race, size or shape is inferior.  All collective judgments about others are wrong.  Only judgmental hypocrites make them. If you judge others by their skin color, their body size, and their outer beauty, you will miss EVERYTHING about who they really are.  It is amazing the quality of people you will learn about and meet in this world if you can simply get past the fact that lots of people are not dressing and living the way you do. People who motivate you to judge or hate others are as bad as bad company gets.  Avoid them at all costs.  (Read The Mastery of Love.)

9.  They want you to be someone else. Spend time with people who see you the way you are, and not as they wish to think you are.  Spend even more time with those who truly know about you, and who love and respect you anyway. If someone expects you to be someone you’re not, take a step back.  It’s wiser to lose relationships over being who you are, than to keep them intact by acting like someone you’re not.  It’s easier to nurse a little heartache and meet someone new, than it is to piece together your own shattered identity.  It’s easier to fill an empty space within your life where someone else used to be, than it is to fill the empty space within yourself where YOU used to be.
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